Thursday, September 8, 2011

Elyse: Enchantingly Verbose

Next up is 27 year old Las Vegas resident and dance team manager, Elyse. Elyse was second runner up is Miss America and cites wet laundry as one of her pet peeves. She loves to bake cupcakes, amass useless trivia, and read memoirs. Leave out the cupcake part and we could be sisters. Tortured artsy female memoirs and biographies cover almost every tabletop in my house. How many books on Anais Nin one gal needs, I do not know, but I've got enough to wallpaper your basement.

If you drink decaf, Elyse wants nothing to do with you and if you're a pretty girl in ugly shoes... forget about it! Elyse will give you the hand and dance away. Apparently, pretty girls should wear pretty shoes. Does that rule hold true for ugly girls? Should they only wear ugly shoes? What if you're having a bad hair day and you've got a pimple on your chin? Do you have to break out the clogs and push the Jimmy Choo's to the back of closet? Elaborate Elyse! You can't just toss out a rule like that and not include the bylaws.

One of the words Miss Elyse uses to describe herself is "enchanting". Enchanting isn't a word you can appoint yourself! Enchanting is a word you let someone with a velvet smoking jacket and monogrammed loafers use to describe you. Alright, let's see how enchanting this Elyse chick really is:

And the award for most words crammed into 90 seconds goes to....

Jesus Christ. She's a piece of work, isn't she? I've never heard someone talk that fast and say so many nice things about themselves in so little time. This one we'll definitely have to keep an eye on. I'm not sure she's villain material, but she'll definitely be a stand out. This is the sort of big personality and confident demeanor I've been ranting about over and over again about on my Bitchy Big Brother Blog. She's exactly the type of person you want to see on a reality show. No way she'll be hiding in the shadows.


  1. I have heard this and from her 34th floor overlooking Vegas while rehearsing speeches all about herself. She looks like a mermaid in this clip.

  2. Good Lord. Just listening to her made me tired. Chick ain't lasting long. She's gonna annoy the heck out of the others on that island.

  3. Jesus! Well I know who I'd be picking for the swimming challenges. Beeotch didn't stop to take breath once. She says she's got the social game sewn...isn't gonna happen unless she gets her trap sewn.

  4. Yeah, she'll get booted early b/c she can't keep her damn mouth shut.