Friday, February 10, 2012

Chelsea: Something To Bitch About

26 year old Chelsea Meissner hails from the great state of South Carolina and sells wheelchairs and bed pans for a living. This self described "bad ass" is an equestrian champion who will not, under any circumstances, be separated from her horsey foot wear. And good for her. Who says knee length leather boots aren't appropriate for the beach? Terrorists, that's who! What else, what else? Her mom got bit by a tick. Yup. That about sums it up. Video me please...

She had me at "I've been in three fist fights." Every season I look for a bad ass bitch to march proudly in a bikini top and equestrian boots through the world of Survivor and I think I've found her. As reserved as she is in this interview, I can see that glint in her eye. That "Pop off son!" that runs through her veins. We bitch people know how to find similar bitch people to recruit and allow into our bitch villages. I can't tell you what we do under the full moon once our gates are closed (disrobe and sacrifice teenage boys to the Shiva goddess while tripping our tits off on peyote), but I will tell you that it's wholesome and for the children or illiteracy or some shit like that. Long story short, I like this one.

Bonus points: Tell me where I got the inspiration for the title.


  1. That movie Something to Talk About with Julia Roberts whe she had a family who raised /showed horses?

  2. I think she's going to go far. When I first saw her, I was thinking, "oh, fucking wonderful- another blonde dumbass," but I think she will be interesting to watch.

    I am so fucking glad we have no RI and no returning players this season.

  3. Those are not real are they? She has "athletic" Not many people posses this. Or the ability to speak clearly.

  4. Better boots than that one who wore heels a couple of seasons ago, maybe she wont get nasty bug bites on her ankles (big maybe).

  5. Glad to see you back in the saddle Ms Lala. I hope you had a lousy Christmas and a lonely and miserable New Year's Eve...
    I want you pounding those keys with bitter, jet fueled bitchiness this season.

    LET'S ROCK!!

  6. Lala, I really hope you're right about this one. I'd love to see a tough, badass Southern girl this season.

    However, the pessimist in me is thinking her video reminds me of lame-ass Whitney from last season.