Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Sabrina: Cleanliness Is Next To Bitchassness
Sabrina Thompson is a 33 year old High School Teacher from Brooklyn, New York. She looks to her brother for inspiration and can't stand it when people put leashes on their children. Oh puh-lease. If you've ever been in a Target on a Saturday innocently trying to buy a birthday card for that bitch you hate and some screaming little rugrat with sticky jelly fingers and a snot-smeared face grabs onto the pant leg of your brand new $150 jeans, you'll be handing out leashes at the door of every preschool in the country. Trust me.
Sabrina also dislikes people who adjust their genitals. Oh come on! She takes the fun out of everything!
Heh. A germaphobe on Survivor. People ask me all the time why I don't go on Survivor and here's the answer - DIRTY FILTHY PEOPLE! Having said that, I think it's hilarious that Sabrina actually went for it and took the plunge. Unfortunately, the germ thing is what is going to make her extremely annoying. She's nice enough. Spunky, blunt, motivated. The problem is that the second she bitches about a piece of sand in her rice, she'll lose the tribe instantly which brings us back to why I won't do the show - NO MASCARA. There are certain things a bitch needs in her everyday life - mascara, a good lip balm, Wen Haircare, and a DVR. And until the powers that be install a fully functional bathroom with toilet paper and a working shower with hot water, Survivor and I will continue to remain but distant lovers.